Imagine life without household gadgets.

How would your girl wash your clothing?

How would your spouse do the dishes?

How would your sister feed you?

And how would the maid clean your place?

Food for thought indeed.

Or rather: poverty, starvation and complete naked truth.

All jokes aside, there is a troubled side to white products.

When they go a paler shade of off white and all of a sudden malfunction, flounder or flat out die, you may as well be a caveman in a cold cavern bashing 2 rocks together for a spark of light to ignite some brushwood.

I’d imagine it would be very similar to existing in a dystopian combination of the Dark Ages (no lights), the Ice Age (no heating), and the Middle Ages (when you absolutely don’t care about anybody else any longer - except yourself and your daughter’s school friends - and go all in and buy a motorcycle, move into a studio apartment, and get a hair transplant just so you can finally tie somebody else’s hair into a ponytail).

Because the total of those ages would certainly have be the very definition of polar purgatory.

And if your refrigerator, fridge or AC happens to be on the fritz, you might as well pray you were Hot Tub Time Machined all of the way back to the Pleistocene Period - because let me tell you, no kind of preservatives, Tupperware or MSG will protect you from the scary ‘Best Before ‘ date.

Meaning you will need to cook some food to survive. But how are you about to do that without a working stove, rangehood or microwave?

I can tell you how. You are going to have to go all urban Bear Grylls. And fast.

If you aren’t willing to get your household appliances and white goods repaired, you better start picking up some dry sticks and weeds, sourcing half a dozen pebbles, and channeling your inner Cadet or Swiss Army Knife.

Because without a working kitchen and washing machine, you might as well set up a bivouac in your bedroom and start an open fire on your terracotta tiles.

It’s only when you realise exactly how much we depend on electrical appliances and take for granted straightforward pieces of cutting edge technology that we start to understand a humble cup of coffee.

As it would not exist without your kettle.

And the clothes you’re wearing right now would not be clean and tidy (presuming they are so) if they had not washed in a washer, spun in a dryer and ironed on an ironing board with an iron.

So much for progressing from the Iron Age. Or the Bronze Age, or the Stone Age.

Or Middle Age.

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